Coming up times were hard, i remember beans & rice and spam & green beans nights at a time. Watching my mother struggle to put here self thru school and raise three bad ass boys. I remember asking why does our grocery money look different then other peoples (food stamps) and she would say because we were special and only lucky people could get that money. I try to tell her everyday just a simple "THANK YOU & I LOVE YOU" and she just says i know. After growing up herself in a shitty situation in state care and being a single mother she is humble and just says i did what i had to do. Still i don't let a day go by with out a call to say what i say and if she doesn't answer it's on her answering machine when she gets home. Now that were all grown and and she doesn't have to struggle just to get ahead, paybills and use that special money at the grocery store......I say...

THANK YOU & I LOVE YOU MOM

Even though Fathers Day is our day don't forget your MOM she made a lot of things possible too...

Now that my 3 year old is going to preschool, my partner and I got a taste of what it is like to socialize with the other parents when my son was invited to his first birthday party.  His classmate had a birthday party at an indoor inflatable jumping playground.  Andrew had the best time.  This was our first time meeting other parents from our son's preschool.

My partner and I struggled a little on where we "fit  in".  You could see all the parents divided up by gender.  Moms with Moms and Dads with Dads.  I kept my eye out on circles that formed both and would ease my way in.  I'm the type to look at a person and smile and introduce myself and my partner is a bit more passive, more like waiting until someone comes up to him to chat.

My partner and I socialized a respectable amount but we mainly played with all the kids.  During pizza and cake, I helped with cleaning spills and getting kids extra drinks and napkins.  As I looked up, in the middle of pouring a little girl some extra apple juice, I noticed the fathers were looking in my direction and the mothers were also busy assisting the children.  I thought to myself, should I be sitting back and chatting with the dads?  Hmm.  It's not really who I am.  I tend to be the one helping out, it's just my nature.  I told myself "nope, stay true to who you are".

After the party, the father of the child that had the birthday came up to me and said, "thanks for helping out during the lunch, we really appreciate it."

We are hoping as we go to more of these functions, we will become familiar to the other parents (who already know each other) and create a few good relationships.  I believe it is just a bit more challenging on both sides.  The parents looking at my partner and I and trying to understand our family dynamic, and of course my partner and I are trying to see where exactly we fit with the rest.

For all the critics and the non-believers that think stay at home parenting is a position that can only be held by a woman and for a man (it's a hard job).Yeah the pay stinks, the hours suck it requires a serious life style change and you will loose contact with many people you now have little in common with because you have 24hr kids now. I agree not everyone is capable of doing it but i'm sure given the opportunity most will agree MOM or DAD can do it. For me the value of being a stay at home DAD makes all the negatives tags society has placed on MEN in our position is like the line in the sand for me. Everyday i wake up i feel like i can run circles around Super MOM even on the days i'm not firing on all cylinders. I owe it to my Family and they deserve it.