Deadbeat dads are scarcer than ever these days, which is good news for the 50% of American kids who won’t live with their father for part of their childhood.

“There are fathers that are very involved,” Pennsylvania State University sociologist and demographer Valarie King told USA Today. “There are some that are not. We have this image of the nonresident dad, and for some, that’s the deadbeat dad.”

Years ago, nonresident dads tended to be divorced. Today, they and the children’s mother typically have been in a short-term, nonmarital relationship. In fact, nonresident fathers are more involved with their children than ever, according to a new study.

When Penn State sociologist and demographer Paul Amato researched changes in nonresident father-child contact over the past 30 years, he found substantial increases in the amount of contact. The percentage of fathers who reported no contact with their children went from 37% in 1976 to 29% in 2002.

Amato, whose work was published in the journal Demography, learned that nonresident dads’ involvement in their kids’ lives varied. Some 38% were highly involved, but 32% were rarely involved. The highly involved dads tended to have kids who were older at the time of the breakup. They were likely to have been married at one time and to have paid child support.

Keeping in contact with kids can be difficult for nonresident dads, according to experts. They have to get along with their child’s mother, they sometimes live a great distance from each other and even if they try to divide duties jointly, schools often insist on defining one parent as primary. What makes it a little easier on dads today is changes in custody laws. Many states now have joint physical custody as well as parenting plans.

Perhaps the best predictor of whether a dad will stay involved, according to Philip Cowan, professor emeritus of psychology at the University of California Berkeley, is if he gets along with the mother.

“They don’t have to love each other or like each other,” Cowan told USA Today. “But they do need to co-parent and collaborate.”

I'm quickly learning that it's the little accomplishments in dadhood that give me so much satisfaction.  I'll give my top 10.  See if you can relate!

1. Getting the baby centered just right on the diaper (enough said)
2. Putting the right nipple on the right bottle or, drip...drip...drip
3. Still possessing the quickness to catch the baby before he grabs the cat's tail, usually
4. Remembering, when dressing the baby - stretch the clothes to fit the baby
5. Singing the entire introduction to Handy Manny
6. Getting someplace on time
7. Getting someplace on time with the baby
8. Teaching him to say what sounds like Thank You
9. Catching a great video with the Flip
10. Actually completing a blog post in under an hour

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I love dadhood!

You never know what will happen when it's time for your child to enter college. Will I have a job? Will they have a job? Will they have a scholarship or financial aid offered to them? With my first three it was a struggle no savings with everything coming out of pocket as we went along.  We were lucky with  academic and athletic scholarships accounting for about 70% of costs only having to come out of pocket about $20k, one is graduated and the other graduates in May.  Me and my wife argue endlessly about who's responsibility was to pay for college. I had no problem paying for school as long as the grades were right, i know friends that are paying for C's and D's which i wasn't going to do and my cut off was the age of 21. My wife's take was no one helped here with college and it was a struggle which took us 5 years into being married before we got it paid off and i didn't want them to be in that same boat we were in. There are a bunch of great sites and programs out there that my girls are benefiting from as they continue on for a couple more years.

http://www.savingforcollege.com/college-savings-calculator/

https://missourimost.s.upromise.com/

http://www.ehow.com/how_7396844_use-ira-school.html

http://www.usnews.com/education/best-colleges/paying-for-college/savings/articles/2010/12/08/roth-ira-vs-529-choosing-the-best-way-to-save-for-college-and-retirement

We could have saved a ton of money by better planning for them and we are definitely planning now for our next two so they have no worries when ready to go to school. We just tuck money into savings were not doing  IRA's or the 529 were scared of the economy LOL!! 

I've been seeing a lot of articles about making $100k a year with no college degree or parents pushing their kids  into sports in hopes of getting athletic scholarships. I know $5-$10 a week wont add up to a lot  in 15 years but with the rising cost of college it's a start.

I'm curious what others are doing??

I wasn't a constant target the way some kids were because i didn't have a problem putting my hands on someone. In my neighborhood there was no getting in a fight or teasing and the families sit down and try to figure shit out. If you get picked on you pick back if you get hit you get hit back pretty cut and dry and if you were to try to cross paths with another family to discuss an issue chances are it's gonna end up like The Hat fields and McKoys. I always let my girls know take the big girl path shrug it off and keep moving unless you have to go hands on and i have to come up to the school it better be to pick them both up and i'll be the one to decide who was right and wrong. I was wrong and luckily didn't have to face that monster and now that i'm older and in a different place with a lot of stuff that i had issues with i'm more inclined to talk about things with adults because these lil kids today can be rough and make you want to choke them out.. LOL!! and demographically we live in a different part of STL.

We were watching a program the other day and this kid was getting picked on and my 3 yr old said he wanted to take Karate. We don't play with guns or knives and we don't advocate violence. When asked why he said something about a boy at school that gets hit and he was gonna chop them next time. Then my wife responds ok we can take Karate. 

So with that said i know i few people that allow their kids to take Karate to defend themselves if they have to but is that really sending a mixed message to the kid that we want them to talk things out while we allow them to train to whoop ass??

Over reaching step dads